Conscious Walking

I was walking with my dog when I saw four children crossing the street, a football in their hands. They were probably on their way to the park—the very same place I was heading with my dog.

One boy, whom I assumed was around 11 years old, approached me and asked for the name of my dog.

“Vanilla,” I replied.

“Oh, she’s so cute! Can I touch her?” he asked.

“Of course you can,” I said.

Two other boys came closer, eager to pet her as well. However, the fourth boy stepped back and acted moody. Suddenly, he stamped his feet on the ground.

After a moment, he hesitantly approached again, his eyes squeezed shut in fear.

“I see you’re scared,” I said gently. “You don’t have to touch the dog. Just be who you are!”

He relaxed a little and then confessed, “I’m still afraid.”

“That’s okay,” I replied. “You know… you can be afraid and laugh at the same time. Why not give it a try?”

Encouraged by his friends’ shouts of “Yes, try it!” not even half a minute later, the boy started to smile.

“You see? You’re doing a great job,” I said.

Suddenly, he looked at me and said, “It’s a nice dog.”

“Yes, you’re right… it’s a nice dog.” I continued to smile as the boy relaxed completely, and soon all four kids dashed off toward the park with their ball.

The Heart Speaks, and the Brain Listens

You see, you don’t need cards, toys, pictures, or drawings to change a state of mind positively. Sometimes, opening your heart and choosing your words with care can create a transformative connection. It’s a gentle reminder that communication from the heart isn’t just poetic—it has a tangible impact on our minds.

Many of us believe that the brain is forced to choose between two opposing emotions, like fear and happiness, as if it were incapable of processing both simultaneously. However, neuroscience tells us a more nuanced story.

A Closer Look at Our Emotional Wiring

Our brain is a marvel of complexity. Structures like the amygdala—an almond-shaped region nestled deep in the brain—play a central role in processing emotions, whether it’s fear, joy, or surprise. While it might seem that our brain must pick one emotion over another, the truth is that it is quite adept at handling a spectrum of feelings at the same time. What often happens is that one emotion might dominate our conscious experience, but behind the scenes, several emotional signals are at work.

When the boy smiled despite his lingering fear, it wasn’t that his brain was incapable of feeling both emotions. Rather, it was engaging in a subtle dance of emotional regulation. The prefrontal cortex (PFC)—the area responsible for decision-making and moderating social behavior—often works alongside the amygdala to help us process and balance conflicting feelings. In that moment, his smile wasn’t just a social cue; it was an act of cognitive regulation, tempering fear with a touch of joy.

The Science of Emotional Balance

In situations where our emotions seem to conflict, several factors come into play: the context, our past experiences, and the strength of the emotional signals. For instance, even though the amygdala might react strongly to fear, the PFC can step in to reinterpret that signal. This interplay allows us to experience a comforting smile even when a hint of fear lingers.

In some conditions—such as post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), autism, or intermittent explosive disorder—the balance can be disrupted. The amygdala might become overly reactive, resulting in heightened fear or impulsivity. Yet, the brain’s inherent plasticity means that with the right support and interventions, these connections can be strengthened, allowing for better emotional regulation and balance.

A Message Beyond Neuroscience

So, what does all this mean for you? It means that our capacity to connect, to heal, and to transform our emotional state is far more dynamic than a simple “either/or” choice. When you speak from the heart, your words are not only touching the unconscious mind—they’re engaging a complex, dynamic system that continuously balances and integrates a myriad of emotions.

This understanding invites us to look at our relationships and our inner dialogues with new eyes. It reminds us that every heartfelt conversation, every gentle encouragement, contributes to an intricate network of emotional signals that shape who we are. So the next time you’re faced with a challenging moment, remember that your brain is already hard at work, blending emotions and crafting a pathway to connection and healing.

Think great, feel wonderful.

Eva